pregnancy – Katie L. Carroll

I’ve been feeling particularly unproductive this year, in part because I haven’t been doing much drafting. It’s my favorite part of the writing process and the one that creatively feels the most fulfilling. I feel whole when I’m in the midst of a draft and able to lose myself in the process of adding words to the page.

The other part of feeling unproductive is being pregnant. With the bad colds all winter long, the morning sickness for the first half of the pregnancy, and the fatigue and swelling that’s come with the last trimester and warmer weather, I haven’t exactly been racking up the work hours. I get that my limits are temporary and necessary right now, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t frustrating as well.

So I’m trying to recognize other ways I’ve been productive this year. The obvious one is I’m growing a baby (no small feat!). I’m also bringing a book baby into the world in October with my middle grade adventure PIRATE ISLAND. I’ts the first time I’m self-publishing a book, and I’ve learned a ton about the process this year, much of which I’ve enjoyed…even when it’s slightly frustrating and takes more time than I had hoped.

Then there are those other little guys (The Boy and The Prince) who demand so much of my time. The Boy flourished in kindergarten and is on his way to being a big first-grader. The Prince is learning and growing so much and will start preschool in the fall. I’ve been doing my best to spend as much quality time with those two before baby (a.k.a. The Gentleman) comes.

I’ve been working on a picture book, doing some freelance work, and working on other small projects as well. Then there’s the veggie garden (we picked our first peas of the season the other day), prepping for baby (six months worth of laundry washed, sorted, and folded and new mini-van purchased), blogging, and all those other things that require time and attention (grocery shopping and dinner, I’m looking at you!).

So, yeah, I think it’s fair to say that I’ve been as productive as I can be with the time and energy I have right now. And it’s important to recognize that (even blog about it) to validate that I’m doing stuff…even if it’s not all the stuff!

What kind of productive have you been lately?

Since #InkRipples is all about travel this month (and I wrote about books – shocker, me writing about books – in my official #InkRipples post “Traveling the World and Beyond”), I decided to offer you up some bonus travel reposts. This is part 1 of the Tahiti tsumani story that originally posted in March 2011, plus some pictures from the more relaxing part of the trip. Look for part 2 next Friday. Enjoy!

002 The wee hours of Friday morning. Sirens blare. Heart quickens. Body from dead asleep to pinpoint alert in seconds. I knew this could happen, but it doesn’t make my pulse pound any slower. I feel the hubby—it’s too dark to see—rise next to me. “Here we go,” I say, not exactly sure what we’re in for. I’ve never been in a tsunami before.

Now I’m not going to pretend like this is some harrowing tale of survival. It’s more a tale of apprehension and anxiety with not much dramatic payoff. I wouldn’t even call it a near miss. The hubby and I are alive and safe. Not like so many people in Japan. Still, I think our tale is one worth telling…if only to keep my mind from churning over the events and the television images over and over again. Writing this down is my therapy.

But let me go back to the beginning, where many—certainly not all—stories start. French Polynesia, island of Moorea, Thursday night. Some combination of jetlag, sun exposure, pregnancy—and yes, even the hubby has been extra tired from me being pregnant—and extreme island relaxation has lulled us into slumber at an early hour.

I wake around 10:00 pm to find the movie we were watching has ended, the television screen a blank blue screen. I flip to CNN, one of three English-speaking channels we have. 8.9 earthquake, Japan. My first thought Damn, that’s strong. At the time, I didn’t know that it was the strongest recorded quake in Japanese history. My second thought This is not good. Not good at all. Even a country so prepared for quakes must surely suffer from one so massive.

CNN already has footage of not only the earthquake, but also of a devastating tsunami that hit northeastern Japan. A 10 meter wall of water. Tsunami warnings up for countries all across the Pacific. Then I think, Uh, oh. We’re in the middle of the southern Pacific on a tiny island. What does that mean for us?

003 The last tsunami to hit French Polynesia after the earthquake in Chili in February 2010 was measured in inches. I had looked it up because after I had heard tsunamis had been in the area, I had wanted to make sure my favorite tropical location was still intact. The remote location and the surrounding coral reefs had kept French Polynesia safe, but that didn’t mean we would get through this one unscathed.

I watched the coverage for about 30 minutes, my anxiety level rising with each development. Footage from the CNN newsroom in Tokyo.Deep breaths. Stay calm. Footage of the wave pouring into northeastern Japan. Keep breathing. Calm, cleansing breaths.Tsunami warnings for Russia, Indonesia, Australia, Hawaii, among other countries and islands. French Polynesia isn’t specifically mentioned, but my attempts to stay calm are failing. I’m in a foreign land. On an exposed island. A tsunami may or may not be approaching.

Time to get another opinion on whether or not I’m overreacting. Time to wake the hubby. He doesn’t seem to share my apprehension. Maybe he’s still half asleep; maybe I am overreacting. This annoys me. He’s supposed to be the one to freak out, not calm, collected, take-everything-in-stride me!

“Should we call the front desk?” I ask. “Or go down there and see what’s going on?”

I’m trying to hide my growing fear, to play this as if I’m curious and just want to be prepared, but a million things are running through my head that I don’t say. Do they even know what is going on down at the front desk? Does Moorea have modern tracking equipment for tsunamis? Do they have adequate warning procedures? The water is so close to our room. Will we have to evacuate? What will happen to all our stuff? Will we even know it’s coming, the water rushing in unannounced and we’ll all drown? Was it a huge mistake to come here while pregnant, putting my unborn child at risk?

008 The hubby seems mildly concerned. His calm demeanor only proves to grate on my already agitated one. He hasn’t been watching the coverage as long as I have. He didn’t see the list of countries under tsunami warnings. He hasn’t let his mind wander to dark places and worse-case-scenarios.

There’s no way I’m sleeping until we find out more information from the resort. I tell the hubby this. He says, “Okay. Let’s walk down to the front desk.”

I’m not sure if he’s humoring me or if he’s also concerned. Either way, I’m relieved to be on my way learning more. The manager at the desk is well informed of the situation. He explains how there are buoys off the coast of the islands that will give us adequate warnings, if we will even need them. He is the picture of calm. He doesn’t think there’s much to worry about. I feel better.

We go back to the room to sleep. We have a solid five hours before the alarms will sound…